Hijinks Epic Adventuuuuuuure - by Dr. Seuss
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Hijinks Epic Adventuuuuuuure - by Dr. Seuss
by Hijinks Wed Jan 01, 2014 4:02 am
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- Chapter 1:
[16:54:29 01/01/14] Hijinks : you know that fishing trip we are going on? Can we go camping as well? I want some marshmellows
[16:54:32 01/01/14] Hijinks : Dam fine.
[16:54:48 01/01/14] Tida : depends
[16:54:59 01/01/14] Hijinks : uh oh, but watch out of teh manticores jinxy!
[16:55:12 01/01/14] * Hijinks pulls out a rocket launcher and blows the manticore up
[16:55:18 01/01/14] Hijinks : "Calculated."
[16:55:29 01/01/14] Tida : we've only agreed on fishing so far
[16:55:36 01/01/14] * Tayari gathers the bits of exploded manticore.
[16:55:50 01/01/14] Hijinks : But now that vamponies are canon, we got much more to worry bout rather than some pussy cats
[16:55:56 01/01/14] * Hijinks puts on sunglasses
[16:56:03 01/01/14] * Hijinks pulls out machine gun
[16:56:14 01/01/14] Hijinks : astalavista! WAHAHAHAHA!
[16:56:18 01/01/14] Hijinks : pewpewpewpew
[16:56:31 01/01/14] Hijinks : Then they all die cause I shot each one in the heart
[16:56:41 01/01/14] * Quantum Flash is not amused.
[16:56:44 01/01/14] Tida : poor things...
[16:57:00 01/01/14] Hijinks : But then it turns out i'm the fabled hero of the thingy whatever its dcalled.
[16:57:01 01/01/14] * Quantum Flash needed them for kitty bombs
[16:57:14 01/01/14] Hijinks : Err, I get an epic fabled sword from teh prophecy.
[16:57:35 01/01/14] Tayari : I take it Jinks is under the influence of the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster. [18:35:41] * Hijinks takes a drink
[16:57:45 01/01/14] Hijinks : Then it's up to me to stop the evil demon guy from stepping on Manehatten and thus killing all the orphans
[16:58:08 01/01/14] Tida : is this why you don't give Hijinks drinks?
[16:58:18 01/01/14] Hijinks : Hijinks hichachacha!
[16:58:26 01/01/14] * Hijinks kills the demonz
[16:58:39 01/01/14] Tayari : This is why you don't give Jinks anything mind-altering. Ever.
[16:58:43 01/01/14] Hijinks : I saved everypony, no need to thank me, you only need to shower me in candy
[16:58:55 01/01/14] * Hijinks gets teh candy!
[16:59:02 01/01/14] Tida : I see...
[16:59:07 01/01/14] * Quantum Flash does not think it is the mind altering drugs.
[16:59:11 01/01/14] Tayari : Well it's either that or the Mirror Pool is involved and this is a clone.
- Chapter 2:
[16:59:13 01/01/14] Hijinks : oooohhhh, Celestia was so impressed, she decided to make me a princess
[16:59:22 01/01/14] * Hijinks now has wings and a horn
[16:59:28 01/01/14] Tida : not even a relaxant?
[16:59:36 01/01/14] Hijinks : ruh roh, but now there's a weed problem. Best take care of that
[16:59:44 01/01/14] * Hijinks uproots all the weeds in the garden
[16:59:45 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : We're looking at a Pie level event.
[17:00:04 01/01/14] Hijinks : "Ah ha!... what do you mean the everfree forest invaded?
[17:00:21 01/01/14] Hijinks : uh oh, looks like my power level is low
[17:00:22 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : Prepare.
[17:00:27 01/01/14] Hijinks : time to farm some monsters
[17:00:39 01/01/14] * Hijinks slaughters innocent bunnies
[17:00:41 01/01/14] * Quantum Flash tosses a senzu bean
[17:00:42 01/01/14] Hijinks : level up!
[17:00:44 01/01/14] Tayari : She became an Alicorn and is experiencing Partial Personality Dilution. I think this is over Pie; this is an XK Class Scenario.
[17:00:51 01/01/14] Tida : Though, isn't this... normal for Hijinks?
[17:01:01 01/01/14] Tayari : Everyone out of the universe.
[17:01:03 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : No, more like a CK
[17:01:16 01/01/14] Hijinks : Now that I am higher level, I can go to the evil castle of evil things
[17:01:36 01/01/14] * Tayari evacuates from the universe.
[17:01:40 01/01/14] * Hijinks equips the pointy stick of chaos and the shield of candy
[17:01:52 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : I am concerned about the fact she is nearly posting faster than I can read.
[17:01:56 01/01/14] Hijinks : now these vampires are toast!
[17:02:05 01/01/14] Tayari : Welcome back, Drift.
[17:02:11 01/01/14] DrifterMc : i have gone nowhere lol
[17:02:19 01/01/14] * Hijinks slashes a vampire, not vampony, see i'm in a different universe now
[17:02:38 01/01/14] Hijinks : Umm, i used the magic mirror portal, but I retained my pony form cause im well good
[17:02:42 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : Which I am pretty sure requires either computer intelligence, superpowers, or clones
[17:02:52 01/01/14] * Hijinks finds epic lootz! including the potion of potion making
[17:03:08 01/01/14] * Hijinks drinks potion of potion making and makes another potion of potion making
[17:03:10 01/01/14] Hijinks : alright!
- Chapter 3:
[17:03:21 01/01/14] Tida : I wonder if she can help me with something later...
[17:03:36 01/01/14] Hijinks : with my neeeew powers, I can tame the rabid dog made out of waffles.
[17:03:41 01/01/14] * Hijinks eats her shield of cnady
[17:03:47 01/01/14] Hijinks : yeehaw!
[17:03:49 01/01/14] Tayari : Influence spreading to alternate universes; By [Insert Deity here], this is worse than an XK Class Event!
[17:03:55 01/01/14] * Hijinks rides a giant caterpiller to the moon
[17:04:08 01/01/14] Hijinks : okey doggi! time to be tamed
[17:04:13 01/01/14] * Hijinks throws a bone at the doggy
[17:04:17 01/01/14] Hijinks : get the bone doggy
[17:04:27 01/01/14] Tida : does this happen everytime Hijinks is given a mind-altering substance?
[17:04:29 01/01/14] * Hijinks aquires doggy pet. Good job Jinxy
- Chapter 4:
[17:04:49 01/01/14] * Hijinks opens a portal to Aterelionamintokintai
[17:04:55 01/01/14] Tayari : I don't know. It's never happened before, and this falls under the list of 'things nobody wants to test ever'.
[17:05:03 01/01/14] Hijinks : It's a new place flled with epic loot as you all well know
[17:05:04 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : I doubt even 76 or even frikkin 343 could help at this point.
[17:05:20 01/01/14] Tida : well... it's being tested right now...
[17:05:25 01/01/14] Hijinks : it's like albion or htrule except with an overly complicated name so it was cancelled.
[17:05:27 01/01/14] DrifterMc : night all
[17:05:35 01/01/14] Tayari : G'night, Drift.
[17:05:36 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : Night
[17:05:37 01/01/14] Tida : goodnight Drifter
[17:05:40 01/01/14] * Hijinks jumps on doggy and rides to the dreaded mountains of pillows
[17:05:49 01/01/14] Hijinks : night night drifter
[17:05:56 01/01/14] Hijinks : now the pillows are quite savage
[17:06:10 01/01/14] Hijinks : the trick is, is to lure them in with icing from a cake.
[17:06:20 01/01/14] * Hijinks uses a knife to seperate icing from a cake
[17:06:30 01/01/14] Hijinks : now what we do is this. Watch carefully.
[17:06:43 01/01/14] * Hijinks turns the icing into a net and throws this over a pillow
[17:06:44 01/01/14] Tida :
[17:06:47 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : Do we dare risking 682?
[17:06:50 01/01/14] Hijinks : now he won't be getting out any time soon
[17:07:02 01/01/14] * Hijinks climbs the stairs to the altar of pizza
[17:07:09 01/01/14] Hijinks : oooooooh PIZZA PARTY
[17:07:15 01/01/14] * Hijinks noms all the pizza
[17:07:30 01/01/14] Hijinks : but watch out jinx, those statues were saving that pizza for their upcoming party
[17:07:38 01/01/14] Hijinks : now they are pretty angry
[17:07:42 01/01/14] Tayari : Let's not involve 682. Honestly there's little the Foundation can do at this point, that I can see. Unless we want to Decommision her.
[17:07:45 01/01/14] Tida : wonder if she can eat universes in this state?
[17:07:54 01/01/14] Hijinks : but don't worry, Hijinks will use her dance of soothingness to calm down the beasts of stone
[17:08:14 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : That's why I suggested 682. With any luck they'll cancel.
[17:08:17 01/01/14] * Hijinks doesn't listen to me, instead she pulls out a guitar and uses the power of rock to overpower the power of stone
[17:08:19 01/01/14] Hijinks : BANANANANANA
[17:08:33 01/01/14] * Hijinks ascends to the epic guitar solo in the sky
[17:08:48 01/01/14] Hijinks : But don't worry, she's not dead
- Chapter 5:
[17:09:12 01/01/14] Hijinks : she's just paying her mother a visit cause she that's what polite kids do when they're old and wise
[17:09:28 01/01/14] * Hijinks brings her mother back to life using her awesomenss
[17:09:35 01/01/14] Hijinks : alright, now to save the world again
[17:09:55 01/01/14] Hijinks : this time I think the cowboy hat wearing seals of the east are being a bit rowdy
[17:10:05 01/01/14] Hijinks : time to take them down a notch, if you know what I mean
[17:10:34 01/01/14] * Hijinks uses her giant epic dragon mount to reach the lands of the cowboy hat wearing seals in the antarcit
[17:10:38 01/01/14] Hijinks : that's how it's spelt
[17:10:53 01/01/14] Hijinks : unfortuneately, the weather was really windy
[17:10:58 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : How about 001:
[17:11:09 01/01/14] * Hijinks was thrown off course and lands on a glacier
[17:11:17 01/01/14] * Tida sips juice
[17:11:24 01/01/14] Tayari : Which 001? There are a few of them.
[17:11:27 01/01/14] Hijinks : ruh roh, this is the same glacier that titanic crashes into
[17:11:34 01/01/14] Hijinks : and look, the shp is heading this way
[17:11:45 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : ALL OF THEM.
[17:11:45 01/01/14] Hijinks : clearly, this is the fault of the cowboy hat wearing seals
[17:12:00 01/01/14] * Hijinks smashes the glacier and makes nice snow cones for everypony on board
[17:12:07 01/01/14] Tayari : ...Hey, wait...
[17:12:17 01/01/14] Hijinks : now the titanic is saved, I must go back to the present and stop the seals
- Chapter 7:
[17:12:34 01/01/14] * Hijinks travels though a wormhole and encounters singing clocks
[17:12:48 01/01/14] Hijinks : Don't mind the clocks, they don't bite.
[17:12:55 01/01/14] Hijinks : I do hear they have ticks though
[17:13:15 01/01/14] Tayari : 732?
[17:13:16 01/01/14] * Hijinks sets up a clock cleaning service and gets rid of the tick infestation in the wormhole
[17:13:37 01/01/14] Hijinks : thank you Jiinxy, they cried out as our brave hero leaves the wormhole
[17:14:00 01/01/14] Hijinks : now back in the right time, Hijinks lands in the middle of the cowboy wearing seals of the east camp
[17:14:13 01/01/14] Hijinks : sorrounded by all sides, there was only one thing our hero could do
[17:14:21 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : NO! NO! NO!NO!
[17:14:27 01/01/14] * Hijinks pulls out a fearsome right hook on the closest seal
[17:14:30 01/01/14] Hijinks : ABAP!
[17:14:41 01/01/14] * Hijinks uperercuts another seal
[17:14:44 01/01/14] Hijinks : POW!
[17:14:50 01/01/14] Tayari : Was it not 732 I was thinking of?
[17:14:55 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : THATS ONE OF THE FEW THINGS THAT COULD POSSIBLY MAKE IT WORSE!
[17:14:57 01/01/14] * Hijinks backhoofs a seal comin in from behind
[17:15:06 01/01/14] Hijinks : ABAMBALAMB
[17:15:10 01/01/14] Tayari : I was thinking it was responsible.
[17:15:22 01/01/14] Hijinks : Now the seals are all cowering in fear at my awesomeness
[17:15:28 01/01/14] * Hijinks puts on sunglasses
[17:15:41 01/01/14] Tayari : 732, go home. You're a negative influence on Jinks.
[17:15:41 01/01/14] Hijinks : "I guess you can call that.... A hole in one."
- Chapter 8:
[17:15:53 01/01/14] * Hijinks flies off to jupitar and lands on it
[17:16:22 01/01/14] * Hijinks lands at a starbucks
[17:16:30 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : Containment protocols are ineffective.
[17:16:35 01/01/14] Hijinks : ummm I would luike a double cheeseburger without meat
[17:16:45 01/01/14] Hijinks : I am herbivore see?
[17:16:52 01/01/14] Tayari : If I were to play the Pony Riffs drinking game with what Jinks is saying, how many times over would I have died of alcohol poisoning?
[17:17:10 01/01/14] Hijinks : I could buy the upgraded teeth upgrade and get another stomuch but I must remain true to my people
[17:17:31 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : 99^99
[17:17:40 01/01/14] Hijinks : I would also like the ol standby and give me some extra bumbertons with my cluckerbytes
[17:17:58 01/01/14] * Hijinks takes her meal, totally paying for all of it.
[17:18:04 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : Maybe contain with 272 to start?
[17:18:07 01/01/14] Hijinks : Hot dam! it's the eating minigame!
[17:18:12 01/01/14] * Hijinks eats the meal
[17:18:17 01/01/14] Hijinks : that was dam fun
- Chapter 9:
[17:18:38 01/01/14] * Hijinks flies off back to Equestria, where nightmare moon is once again destroying everything
[17:19:01 01/01/14] Hijinks : ruh roh, looks like Luna had a bit too much fidgets if you know what I mean
[17:19:05 01/01/14] Hijinks : best get ths done quickly
[17:19:13 01/01/14] Tayari : I don't think we should tackle one maybe-containment-breach with more SCPs.
[17:19:13 01/01/14] * Hijinks slaps Nightmare moon
[17:19:16 01/01/14] Hijinks : Get better!
- Chapter 10:
[17:19:33 01/01/14] Hijinks : Now that nightmare moon is luna again, we should really get better gear
[17:19:47 01/01/14] Hijinks : the best way to do this is to go to the cyrpts of dead ponies
[17:19:52 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : You're right. Obviously THIS is 001
[17:19:59 01/01/14] Tayari : I'm inclined to seek out the pantheon of the Pony POV series. Pandora would help.
[17:20:00 01/01/14] Hijinks : it's appropriately named because dead ponies are puted down there
[17:20:16 01/01/14] Tayari : Maybe get the Wolf as well.
[17:20:20 01/01/14] * Hijinks goes to the crypt using a turtle as a car
[17:20:27 01/01/14] Hijinks : vroooooooom
[17:20:32 01/01/14] Hijinks : vroom vrooom VROOOOOOM
[17:20:36 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : ... That might work
[17:20:37 01/01/14] Hijinks : it was a really fast turlte
[17:20:43 01/01/14] Hijinks : or maybe it was the sound effects
[17:20:57 01/01/14] * Hijinks bashes on the door to the crypt
[17:21:03 01/01/14] Hijinks : lemme in you darn zombies
[17:21:10 01/01/14] Tayari : Heck, just chuck her in that universe and get the Shining Armor arc to repeat itself.
[17:21:15 01/01/14] Hijinks : but the zombies, they were like "noooo"
[17:21:28 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : ...whoa
[17:21:29 01/01/14] Hijinks : So I stared him down and I turned him into jelly
[17:21:31 01/01/14] Hijinks : Literally
[17:21:35 01/01/14] Tayari : Or a simpler solution we haven't tried yet.
[17:21:42 01/01/14] Hijinks : So now that zomble is jelly
[17:21:47 01/01/14] Tayari : Hijinks, could you please stop?
[17:21:57 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : ... Log off?
[17:22:01 01/01/14] Hijinks : Umm, we should get some extra sprinkles in here
[17:22:15 01/01/14] Hijinks : Oh, tell john to leave those tacos by the fireplace.
[17:22:21 01/01/14] Tayari : Also, I may be an idiot, mentioning details of the POV series like that so carelessly...
[17:22:34 01/01/14] Hijinks : Hmmm, what is this? Is this a new kind of sandwich
[17:22:48 01/01/14] Hijinks : I love this! get me ten more of this and put the sandwich on tv
[17:22:54 01/01/14] Hijinks : I wanna see this publicizied
[17:22:58 01/01/14] Hijinks : That's a thing now
- Chapter 11:
[17:23:03 01/01/14] Tayari : Jinks, you're grounded.
[17:23:05 01/01/14] Hijinks : You have me to thank for that
[17:23:08 01/01/14] Hijinks : aww
[17:23:15 01/01/14] Hijinks : But I liked my wings
[17:23:24 01/01/14] Hijinks : clearly Tay is being possessed by evil spirits
[17:23:29 01/01/14] * Hijinks slaps Tayari
[17:23:35 01/01/14] Hijinks : back evil spirits, Back!
- Chapter 12:
[17:24:00 01/01/14] Hijinks : Now that the evil spirits are gone, we must catch up on the daily news for penguin golf
[17:24:14 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : Wait, I just found a few things of Movit 11.
[17:24:16 01/01/14] Tayari : Evil spirits aren't gone, they weren't there to begin with.
[17:24:23 01/01/14] Hijinks : hmm, looks like peppi junior gots a hole in one on the 3rd hole
[17:24:40 01/01/14] Hijinks : Ruh roh! Penguin golf alert!
[17:24:46 01/01/14] Hijinks : WAAAH WAAAH WAAAAH
[17:24:51 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : unstoppable until it wears off
[17:25:03 01/01/14] Hijinks : looks like pengu got a erfect score on all holes
[17:25:14 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : or the user spontaneously combusts
[17:25:21 01/01/14] Hijinks : ummmm except for this next hole which he is about to attempt
[17:25:40 01/01/14] Hijinks : umm, nice air with that hit. Looks like a good shot.
[17:25:58 01/01/14] Hijinks : Ruh roh, lets like swiper rode a hot air balloon into the air and swiped the ball
[17:26:02 01/01/14] Hijinks : can you see swiper?
[17:26:15 01/01/14] Hijinks : Oh, he's over there by the hippo skating rink
[17:26:30 01/01/14] * Hijinks roundhouse kicks swiper into next century.
- Intermission. Time to go the little filly's room, kids!:
[17:26:38 01/01/14] Tayari : Hey, Jinks, want an honest critique of this literary work you've got here?
[17:26:40 01/01/14] Hijinks : He's gonna feel that in the morning
[17:26:41 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : ... why do I have the idea that this always happens and we just don't normally hear about it?
[17:27:01 01/01/14] Hijinks : Cleary, this story is a book for all ages
[17:27:06 01/01/14] Hijinks : it appeals to everypony
[17:27:13 01/01/14] Hijinks : and the protaginist is just perfect
[17:27:21 01/01/14] Tayari : A brutally honest critique of this thing?
[17:27:23 01/01/14] Hijinks : I give it a Taco bell out of five
[17:27:45 01/01/14] Hijinks : There's not much to be angry about from this story
[17:27:55 01/01/14] Hijinks : all the characters are well donw, the chapters tie in nicely
[17:28:01 01/01/14] Hijinks : it truly is a work of art
- Chapter 12 2:
[17:28:17 01/01/14] Hijinks : okey, back to me roundhouse kicking.
[17:28:24 01/01/14] Hijinks : I kicked that ball into the hole
[17:28:46 01/01/14] Hijinks : and pengu, he was like. "Thank you so much Jinxy. You are my hero, have a hundred bucks."
[17:28:47 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : I could probably analyze this and give you average post speed, word count, words per minute sometime tomorrow.
[17:29:05 01/01/14] Tida : that would be cool
[17:29:07 01/01/14] Hijinks : I of couse used that one hundred dollers to buy a rocket powered pogo stick
- Chapter 13:
[17:29:33 01/01/14] Hijinks : I will use this to luanch myself to the top of the clocktower I always wanted to get to
[17:29:51 01/01/14] Hijinks : umm, but of course the clock tower actually turned out to be an evil trandformer in disquise
[17:30:00 01/01/14] Hijinks : An autobot if I recall correctly
[17:30:17 01/01/14] Hijinks : Now I slapped that tin can across the face
[17:30:28 01/01/14] Hijinks : and now he's crying like a dang baby
[17:30:38 01/01/14] Tida : this is amazing
[17:30:48 01/01/14] Hijinks : So I gave him a bottle of milk, and some mushed carrots and a xxl diaper
[17:31:07 01/01/14] Hijinks : he was like. "thank you jinxy, you saved me"
[17:31:08 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : This will go in several records
[17:31:19 01/01/14] Tida : sure will
[17:31:26 01/01/14] Hijinks : And I was like, "Oh, no problem autobet. you can always count on me."
[17:31:31 01/01/14] Hijinks : And then I ate him
[17:31:35 01/01/14] Tayari : Not all of them good.
[17:31:42 01/01/14] Hijinks : It tasted slightly of copper but that was okey
[17:31:43 01/01/14] Tida : of course
[17:32:01 01/01/14] Hijinks : Now, then this pidgeon flew over to me and landed on my shoulder
[17:32:05 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : at this point containment is not possible and all that is left to do is pick up what remains.
[17:32:22 01/01/14] Tayari : Or just riff it.
[17:32:30 01/01/14] Hijinks : And he said to me, he said to me. "Jinxy, the fire king stole the dirt princess again. You must save her."
[17:32:31 01/01/14] Tida : if anything remains at all
[17:32:47 01/01/14] Hijinks : And I was like. "No way, that princess is dirt cheap, het her outta here."
[17:33:04 01/01/14] Hijinks : Ummmm I mean get
[17:33:13 01/01/14] Hijinks : you know you just get up, and you get
[17:33:18 01/01/14] Hijinks : you get me?
- Chapter 14:
[17:33:33 01/01/14] Hijinks : so with my laser beams I stole from that dumbo robotoo
[17:33:52 01/01/14] Hijinks : I blasted a hole in the canterlot castle and found the secret party room
[17:34:16 01/01/14] Hijinks : And Bill Clinton was there, and so was Johnny Depp and Elvis pressly
[17:34:23 01/01/14] Hijinks : So I was like, hai guisee.
[17:34:30 01/01/14] Tayari : Secret parties? What kinds of parties are secret?
[17:34:33 01/01/14] Hijinks : And then they gave me candy, cause I was adorable
[17:34:36 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : The event has been ongoing for 40 minutes currently.,
[17:35:04 01/01/14] Hijinks : I know that I am adorable, but I lack the sufficient amount of cute to reach to secret last level
[17:35:05 01/01/14] Tida : which is amazing
[17:35:16 01/01/14] Hijinks : So I had to use my puppy dog eyes trick
[17:35:23 01/01/14] Tayari : Who has secret parties? The fun ones aren't all secret-y, they're fun!
[17:35:39 01/01/14] Hijinks : Of course, using a puppy dog to open the secret door was pretty effective
- Chapter 15:
[17:35:47 01/01/14] Hijinks : So now I am n the last level
[17:35:57 01/01/14] Hijinks : ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, there's a cat here
[17:36:06 01/01/14] Hijinks : Clearly, this is the guide to the final level
[17:36:11 01/01/14] * Hijinks presses A to jump
[17:36:15 01/01/14] Tayari : I take it this Jinksicorn has taken lessons from Woona on using cuteness?
[17:36:20 01/01/14] Hijinks : ain't nopony got time for dat!
[17:36:23 01/01/14] Hijinks : so I shot him!
[17:36:40 01/01/14] Hijinks : Now that cat, he wasnt a cat at all!
[17:36:42 01/01/14] Tayari : Shooting cats? Why!?
[17:36:44 01/01/14] Hijinks : he was in fact, a chair
[17:37:01 01/01/14] Hijinks : Now, chairs, as you all know, are pretty violent if they get shot
[17:37:13 01/01/14] Hijinks : So now I had to use my extra special trick
[17:37:15 01/01/14] Tayari : A lot of things are.
[17:37:20 01/01/14] * Hijinks slaps the chair
[17:37:23 01/01/14] Tayari : Being shot isn't nice.
[17:37:29 01/01/14] Hijinks : ABAPAPAPAPA!
[17:37:43 01/01/14] Tida : being slapped isn't nice either
[17:37:43 01/01/14] Hijinks : now the chair is dealt with, I can move on.
[17:37:55 01/01/14] * Hijinks skies down a hill with epic style and grace
[17:37:56 01/01/14] Tayari : Tell me about it.
[17:37:58 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : Final analysis: ZK class scenario.
- Chapter 16:
[17:38:16 01/01/14] Hijinks : but remember kids, you always want to pick up the photos on your way out.
[17:38:31 01/01/14] Tayari : An epically stylish and graceful protagonist. Never heard that one before.
[17:38:34 01/01/14] Hijinks : You know in theme parks where they have cameras put up on the scare moments
[17:38:39 01/01/14] Hijinks : Well yeah, that works
[17:39:03 01/01/14] Hijinks : Ummm, they cost five bucks each, and I spent the rest of my money on the pogostick
[17:39:09 01/01/14] Hijinks : So I challenged him to a duel
[17:39:29 01/01/14] Hijinks : He put up a good fight, but his deck didn't have an instant win card like me
[17:39:43 01/01/14] Hijinks : So I won through high intelligence
[17:39:50 01/01/14] Tida : coalition victory?
[17:39:53 01/01/14] Hijinks : carefull setup and such
[17:40:11 01/01/14] Hijinks : Now as all of you know, the last level is a lava level
[17:40:25 01/01/14] Tida : I thought the previous level was the last level
[17:40:35 01/01/14] Hijinks : Good thing for me, my scuba gear also covers lava, so I could swim past all the annoying jumping puzzles
[17:40:40 01/01/14] Tayari : Instant win cards aren't smart or skillful. They're instant wins and really risky to pull off.
[17:41:01 01/01/14] Hijinks : But Hijinks is so skilful that she can instantly win
[17:41:07 01/01/14] Tayari : Scuba gear covers lava? Yeah, screw logic.
[17:41:15 01/01/14] Hijinks : clearly, doing that requires more skill
[17:41:18 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : Unique scenario 2. Tayari did NOT welcome someone back.
[17:41:21 01/01/14] Tida : laboratory maniacs?
- Chapter 13 2, the sequal:
[17:41:32 01/01/14] Hijinks : now that I have reached the center of the planet, I encounter the final boss
[17:41:48 01/01/14] Hijinks : Turns out, it was that dam pidgeon I talked to earlier
[17:41:58 01/01/14] Tayari : A solid iron core that is incredibly hot in a physical sense? Nope. Pigeon.
[17:42:08 01/01/14] Hijinks : I was like "You1 you feathery bird brain. Ima getchu."
[17:42:25 01/01/14] Tida : an iron pidgeon perhaps?
[17:42:34 01/01/14] Hijinks : but he was like. "Uuuuuuuhh, nope."
[17:42:49 01/01/14] Hijinks : And so he fired a rocket at me, but I grabbed it and thew it back at him
[17:43:12 01/01/14] Hijinks : he dodged that one though, cause I was careless at that moment. Busy signing an autograph for a kid
- Chapter 17:
[17:43:50 01/01/14] Hijinks : So the pidgeon blasted me with a huge kami hami ya lazor, but then I said. "Good thing I have my die move!"
[17:43:54 01/01/14] Hijinks : So I died
[17:44:00 01/01/14] * Tayari uses some brain bleach to get past that segment.
[17:44:09 01/01/14] Hijinks : But then I came back as the vampony that doesn't sparkle
[17:44:26 01/01/14] * Tida tucks his sanity away in his saddlebags
[17:44:27 01/01/14] Hijinks : and then I killed him aheheheheheheheheheheh
[17:44:37 01/01/14] Tayari : And proceeded to become a hunter in the night, drinking the blood of innocents?
[17:44:54 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : Event Journal: 50 minutes have passed. I'm the only one who has retained my sanity. I stared into the abyss, it stared back, and ran.
[17:44:56 01/01/14] Hijinks : but now I'm in a prediciment cause I am now vampony and I only have oone day to find teh cure
- Chapter 19? I lost count:
[17:45:15 01/01/14] Tayari : Where'd that knowledge come from?
[17:45:21 01/01/14] Hijinks : So I traveled back to canterlot, but It was under attack by a giant slime
[17:45:23 01/01/14] Tayari : And why do you know the time limit and not the cure itself?
[17:45:24 01/01/14] Tida : hopefully, you don't sparkle
[17:45:29 01/01/14] Hijinks : so I was like, "Well ok".
[17:45:35 01/01/14] Hijinks : And then A BAP BAP BAP
[17:45:45 01/01/14] Hijinks : That scene is too violent for me to describe
[17:45:53 01/01/14] Tayari : Aaand yet to get any respite from the story or its 'action scenes'.
[17:46:06 01/01/14] Hijinks : But in the end, I reached the caastle and found good old Celestia
[17:46:27 01/01/14] Hijinks : So I was like "Cure me"
[17:46:36 01/01/14] Tayari : Who, being the next best thing to the Sun itself, promptly burned the vampire.
[17:46:37 01/01/14] Hijinks : And she was like "Kaaaaaaaaaaay"
[17:46:44 01/01/14] Hijinks : And now I'm not a vampony
[17:46:56 01/01/14] Hijinks : Well, the smart thing is, is that I had an umbrella the whole time
[17:47:04 01/01/14] Hijinks : it was just invisible so you didn't notice
[17:47:05 01/01/14] Tayari : What a gripping story arc. Amazing. I only used brain bleach once.
[17:47:21 01/01/14] Tayari : If it was invisible, the light would've passed through and hit you anyway.
[17:47:23 01/01/14] * Tida takes his sanity out and puts it back
- Chapter 20:
[17:47:30 01/01/14] Hijinks : This umbrella is also the key to unlocking the door to a different dimension
[17:47:36 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : no, it just erased your memories of the last 27 times
[17:47:38 01/01/14] Hijinks : A realm ooooooof Fish PEOPLE!
[17:47:41 01/01/14] Tayari : Naturally.
[17:47:43 01/01/14] Hijinks : Dun Dun Duuuuuuuun
[17:48:06 01/01/14] Hijinks : So I swam through teh ocean, using my scuba gears
[17:48:07 01/01/14] * Tayari keeps a record of his uses of brain bleach.
[17:48:14 01/01/14] Hijinks : And then I found a seahorse
[17:48:22 01/01/14] Hijinks : and it was like "You can ride me"
[17:48:33 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : and ends up like those scenes from Dr. Who with the Silence.
[17:48:37 01/01/14] Tayari : [Insert crude joke here]
[17:48:38 01/01/14] Hijinks : So then I rode the seahorse to that underwater city
[17:48:57 01/01/14] Tayari : Atlanta?
[17:49:03 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : [insert gutter comment]
[17:49:04 01/01/14] Hijinks : And then I reached Bioshock city, and there was this king
[17:49:36 01/01/14] Hijinks : And he was like, "I need a special crystal."
[17:49:48 01/01/14] Hijinks : And so I got into a giant rocket ship and flew to the moon
[17:49:57 01/01/14] Hijinks : But I crashed cause I'm not good driver
[17:50:01 01/01/14] Tida : [Insert some sort of comment]
[17:50:17 01/01/14] Tayari : A fault!
[17:50:22 01/01/14] Hijinks : Once I got on the moon, sheriff woody was there and he said "YEEHAW!"
[17:50:35 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : Tay, do you have a skype?
[17:50:42 01/01/14] Tayari : There was a legitimate fault in the character which affected the- wait, on the moon anyway.
[17:50:49 01/01/14] Hijinks : And I was like, "Calm down cowboy, Ima here for teh crystal"
[17:50:55 01/01/14] Tayari : I do. urala.alaha212
[17:51:11 01/01/14] Tayari : Anyone want me to stop? I feel I might be overdoing this.
[17:51:13 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : ah ok.
[17:51:21 01/01/14] Hijinks : And he was like, sure okey, "You just got to take it from bubsy over there."
[17:51:22 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : overdoing what?
[17:51:36 01/01/14] Tayari : Riffing.
[17:51:39 01/01/14] Hijinks : And so I aimed my guns at Bubsy and said "Buh bai bubby."
[17:51:54 01/01/14] Hijinks : But then I realise I was out of bullets
[17:52:01 01/01/14] Hijinks : And then he kicked my head off
[17:52:11 01/01/14] Hijinks : He kicked my head off into the sun
[17:52:11 01/01/14] Tayari : Making joking comments about the story, especially centered around its faults, and often antagonistic.
- Chapter 21:
[17:52:16 01/01/14] Hijinks : and I landed in sunland
[17:52:26 01/01/14] Tida : Like mystery science theather?
[17:52:33 01/01/14] Hijinks : And Micheal Jordan founded me, and he was like "Hiya Jinxie!"
[17:52:35 01/01/14] Tayari : Yes.
[17:52:39 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : I thought you meant the red text
[17:52:41 01/01/14] Tida : nah
[17:52:48 01/01/14] Tida : keep going
[17:52:48 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : it's my thing after all
[17:52:50 01/01/14] Hijinks : And he liked me cause I was so cuuuute and adorable
[17:53:00 01/01/14] Hijinks : and he gave me a space car
[17:53:14 01/01/14] Hijinks : and I drove that space car, and drove it into the moon, right on top of bubsy
[17:53:20 01/01/14] Tayari : Totally kawaii. Now I need to erase my memory of ever saying that.
[17:53:25 01/01/14] * Tayari uses more brain bleach.
[17:53:27 01/01/14] Hijinks : so now that he was dead, I got the crystal from Wody.
[17:53:52 01/01/14] Hijinks : And now I jumped off the moon and did a swan dive into the ocean, back to Bioshock city
[17:53:57 01/01/14] Tayari : Also, what story arc are we in now? #433?
[17:54:16 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : it's an irrational number.
[17:54:20 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : it goes on forever
[17:54:23 01/01/14] Hijinks : now that the king has the crystal, he can finally power his microwave
[17:54:33 01/01/14] Hijinks : so I saved the peoples from starving
[17:54:47 01/01/14] Tida : Hijinks has divided by 0... multiple times
- Chapter 22:
[17:55:00 01/01/14] Hijinks : Now that those people are saved, I will take a second to save here
[17:55:01 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : that one's easy
[17:55:04 01/01/14] * Hijinks saves the game
[17:55:12 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : try raising 0 to the 0 power
[17:55:21 01/01/14] * Hijinks overwrites the previous save
[17:55:25 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : or dividing 0 by 0
[17:55:42 01/01/14] Hijinks : the previous save was still in the sonic hills.
[17:55:43 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : or finding the square root of -i
[17:55:47 01/01/14] Hijinks : That levels is old
[17:56:05 01/01/14] * Hijinks takes a nap as the alcihol wears out
[17:56:21 01/01/14] Tayari : ...Is it over?
[17:56:27 01/01/14] Tida : all I have to say... is wow
[17:57:24 01/01/14] Tida : trying to wrap your head around that would probably explode one's head
[17:57:36 01/01/14] * Tayari would celebrate, but first he must collapse and be unconscious a while after experiencing that. Excuse me.
[17:58:14 01/01/14] Tida : It's a good thing that nothing bad happe-
[17:58:21 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : That was approximately 1:02 in length
[17:58:26 01/01/14] * Tida bursts into flames
[17:58:35 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : and occupied nearly the entirely of the archives.
[17:58:45 01/01/14] Tida : AAAAAAAHHHHHHH
[17:59:01 01/01/14] Quantum Flash : the approximate equivalent of 9-12 hours of normal use
[17:59:24 01/01/14] * Tida flails around
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Last edited by Hijinks on Wed Jan 08, 2014 7:02 am; edited 3 times in total
Hijinks- Moderator
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Re: Hijinks Epic Adventuuuuuuure - by Dr. Seuss
by Tida Wed Jan 01, 2014 4:06 am
Moral of the story?
Drugs are bad, mmmkay? You shouldn't do drugs
Drugs are bad, mmmkay? You shouldn't do drugs
Tida- Pie
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Re: Hijinks Epic Adventuuuuuuure - by Dr. Seuss
by Paradox Thu Jan 02, 2014 12:35 pm
Preliminary analysis of ZK level event.
Time taken: 68:21
WPM- 42.33
Post count- 262
Post speed- 4.23
Time taken: 68:21
WPM- 42.33
Post count- 262
Post speed- 4.23
Paradox- Fancy Pants
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Re: Hijinks Epic Adventuuuuuuure - by Dr. Seuss
by Hijinks Wed Jan 08, 2014 7:04 am
Woooooah. GUYS! Check it out! The Hijinks Epic Adventuuuuuuuure has been remade in HD! Look at the spacing, the colours, the chapters! Ooooooh, gotta love the HD remakes.
Hijinks- Moderator
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